The "Inside-Out Omelette" (i.e., John clears out his fridge)

Everyone knows the routine. You open up the refrigerator, and you realize that half the crap in it is expired and the other half is about to go bad. Then you make that fateful decision - try to combine the remaining useful food items into something delicious. Sometimes this works wonderfully. Other times, not so much.

Either way, I ran into this dilemma this morning. So there I was, tossing out some bell pepper remains that had gone bad when I came across the avocado and the eggs. Eureka, a California omelette. A bit more searching, and I come across a tomato and some green onions. Alright, we're getting somewhere. And then finally, the moment arrives. Cilantro. Time to get creative.

Now I had too many fillers and entirely too few eggs. In any case, I decided to press on, and I dubbed the result the "Inside-Out Omelette."

Onto the ingredients and recipe. All you need is a dash of milk, 4 eggs, 5-6 green onion bulbs and greens, 1 small tomato, 1 small avocado, 1/8-1/4 cup or so of shredded cheddar cheese, and a handful of chopped up cilantro. To make the new and improved "Inside-Out Omelette", proceed as you would with a usual omelette. Before doing anything, chop up the green onions, tomato, and avocado. Then, stir up the eggs in a bowl with the milk until it bubbles. In the meantime, heat up a buttered-up frying pan on medium heat. Then, pour the eggs in the pan and wait until the edge of the egg is hard. Once that happens, chuck the green onions, tomato, avocado, cheese, and cilantro onto the egg. The egg might collapse a bit under its own weight. Let it happen. Let it be ugly just this once. After a minute, "flip" the omelette. Undoubtedly, this will fail completely. However, just try to flip the chunks that remain. Cook for another minute and you're done. Super simple. Super delicious.

I believe the key ingredients of this delicious monstrosity to be the avocado and the cilantro. The avocado gives the creamy goodness, while the cilantro gives the delightful kick. I believe the cilantro is what pushed this variant of the California omelette to the realm of "definitely do this again soon."

Anyways, make sure to enjoy this with a bowl of red grapes, a glass of OJ, and a cup of espresso. Why, you ask? Why not, I respond. And naturally, good luck on finishing the omelette. It is pretty f'ing huge.


P.S. The grapes aren't molding. They are just glowing. They are that good. Or maybe, just maybe, the camera's flash had something to do with it.